Self-awareness in leadership: why true leadership starts with Wake Up

The first step in Needs Driven Leadership, according to Anke Baak

Coaching, directive, transformational—there are countless ways to lead. But at Relevance, we believe effective leadership doesn’t start with behavior. It starts with understanding what your team needs. That’s why we work with the Needs Driven Leadership model. Not a fixed style, but a way of seeing and acting based on what the situation calls for.
That demands more than skills or knowledge. It requires self-awareness.
And that’s where leadership begins.

Anke Baak, Senior Leadership Development Consultant at Relevance, has guided leaders through this first stage for years—the moment where you stop doing and start noticing.

What is Needs Driven Leadership?

Ask any leadership trainer: what is personal leadership? Most will say it’s about knowing yourself and taking ownership of your behavior. That’s true—but it’s only the start.

At Relevance, we believe personal leadership only becomes meaningful when it’s linked to context: what does your team need from you? Our answer is Needs Driven Leadership—a model built around four fundamental team needs:

• Performance – direction, structure and results

• People – connection, trust and psychological safety

• Progress – innovation, learning and growth

• Principles – shared values, integrity and purpose

To develop leadership that truly responds to those needs, we guide leaders through three key phases: Wake Up, Grow Up and Show Up. This journey combines personal insight with strategic action and behavioral change.

Want to learn more about the model? Read: What is Needs Driven Leadership?

Wake Up: leadership starts with awareness

Wake Up is the foundation of Needs Driven Leadership—and the starting point of personal leadership. It’s where leaders step back to examine how their behavior comes across, which patterns they fall into, and where their blind spots lie.

This isn’t guesswork. We use tools like 360-degree feedback, leadership tests and guided reflection to map out behavior that’s often automatic and invisible.

“People often think they’re a coaching leader,” says Anke. “Until they hear from their team that the experience is very different. That moment of real insight often shifts everything.”

Wake Up isn’t about judgment—it’s about awareness. About letting go of assumptions and seeing the real effect of your behavior.

“The leaders who grow the most aren’t always the most experienced,” Anke adds. “They’re the ones who stay curious about themselves.”

This is where personal leadership becomes real: through honest feedback, reflection and a deeper understanding of the patterns that shape your leadership style.

Grow Up: from awareness to development

Once you see your patterns, the next step is to shift them. In Grow Up, leaders actively practice new behavior and develop skills that align with their team’s needs.

“Awareness is one thing,” says Anke. “Changing your behavior is another—especially when the old way once brought success.”

This is where leadership development gets practical. Leaders learn how to give feedback more effectively, communicate with clarity and confidence, and respond flexibly to resistance. With coaching and experimentation, they start showing up differently.

Show Up: leading with intention

In the final phase, Show Up, leaders put their development into action. They lead with awareness, reflect on what works, and adapt as needed. It’s not about being perfect—it’s about being intentional.

“The point isn’t to never fall back into old habits,” Anke explains. “It’s about recognizing it when it happens—and knowing how to reset.”

This is where leadership becomes visible. When leaders show who they are, what they stand for, and how they help their team move forward.

No leadership without awareness

Wake Up, Grow Up and Show Up form a clear path toward sustainable leadership. But it all begins with self-awareness.

“If you don’t understand yourself, you can’t grow,” says Anke. “You can only take care of others if you know how you operate.”

Personal leadership only adds value when it’s connected to the needs of your team. That’s why every journey starts with Wake Up.

Want your leaders to make that shift too? Start by looking inward.

About Relevance

Relevance is the in-company leadership and talent development partner of Schouten & Nelissen. With over 40 years of experience, 900+ facilitators and more than 100,000 participants each year, Relevance helps organizations turn leadership into real, measurable impact. Always tailored. Always evidence-based. Always focused on what works.

Ready to take leadership further?

Curious how Needs-Driven Leadership could work for your team or organization? Book a free session with one of our Leadership Advisors. We’d love to explore what’s possible for your people and your goals.